{"id":8036,"date":"2010-04-22T07:33:46","date_gmt":"2010-04-22T12:33:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/?p=8036"},"modified":"2010-03-23T12:09:05","modified_gmt":"2010-03-23T17:09:05","slug":"anderson-chris-everything-1","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/?p=8036","title":{"rendered":"Anderson, Chris &#8211; Everything #1"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.pinkdresson.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Website<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.doctorsquid.com\" target=\"_blank\">Also a website<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/everything11.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" title=\"everything11\" src=\"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/everything11.jpg\" alt=\"everything11\" width=\"316\" height=\"414\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><strong>Everything #1<\/strong> <strong>(with Mark Hensley)<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I said in the review for Try Adventure that I doubted that all of  Chris&#8217;s comics would be as great as that one, as it was a pile of  undistilled awesome.\u00c2\u00a0 I would like to happily report that, as of my  reading the second comic in this pile, I was wrong.\u00c2\u00a0 Sure, it&#8217;s possible  that some of the ones left to read are going to suck, but at this point  I highly doubt it.\u00c2\u00a0 This is the story of, well, everything, and it  boggles my mind that there&#8217;s so much crap in the movie theaters over the  summer when somebody could just get the rights to this comic and have  the biggest summer blockbuster of all time.\u00c2\u00a0 This is going to be a  tricky thing to review, as I don&#8217;t want to give away a single thing  about this comic.\u00c2\u00a0 The real joy of this issue was in seeing what Chris  and Mark were going to come up with on each page.\u00c2\u00a0 Still, I do have to  give a few things away, don&#8217;t I?\u00c2\u00a0 I can&#8217;t just tell everybody to go out  there and buy this and expect to have it happen.\u00c2\u00a0 OK, fine.\u00c2\u00a0 The comic  starts off with you (yes, you) waiting for your estranged father to meet  you for dinner.\u00c2\u00a0 Your ex is serving you, and you can tell she wants to  get back together with you.\u00c2\u00a0 Your father arrives, and he turns out to be  Mike Tyson.\u00c2\u00a0 Sadly, there&#8217;s very little time to enjoy your meeting, as  the kitchen staff is trying to impregnate a gorilla with human sperm.\u00c2\u00a0  This leads to a kitchen brawl, as you turn into an Ankylosaurus (thanks  to your amulet) and Mike Tyson (who wears his boxing gloves wherever he  goes) obliterates the doctor.\u00c2\u00a0 You swat another doctor with your tail,  knocking him through the window, into space and directly into the sun.\u00c2\u00a0  Sadly, it turns out the gorilla&#8217;s intentions were pure and\u00c2\u00a0 he wanted to  be just like us.\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 I have just described the first five (5) pages of  this 28 page comic.\u00c2\u00a0 I haven&#8217;t even mentioned the lizard men, your  concert or the fact that every woman in this comic would clearly love  the chance to sleep with you.\u00c2\u00a0 I&#8217;ve said it before, but only when it&#8217;s  been completely true: it&#8217;s comics like these that keep me happy to sit  down and work on this website every day.\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 If you have a sense of humor  you&#8217;re only hurting yourself by not checking this out.\u00c2\u00a0 No price is  listed, I&#8217;d guess $2, but really any price he asks for this is more than  fair.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/everything12.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" title=\"everything12\" src=\"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/07\/everything12.jpg\" alt=\"everything12\" width=\"397\" height=\"534\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Website Also a website Everything #1 (with Mark Hensley) I said in the review for Try Adventure that I doubted that all of Chris&#8217;s comics would be as great as that one, as it was a pile of undistilled awesome.\u00c2\u00a0 I would like to happily report that, as of my reading the second comic in [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[2466,538,2467],"class_list":["post-8036","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-chris-anderson","tag-everything","tag-mark-hensley"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8036","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8036"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8036\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8041,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8036\/revisions\/8041"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8036"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8036"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/opticalsloth.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8036"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}